Sunday, 9 August 2015

The Need To Change

the wise answer comes from the question
"is it needed to change ourselves for some people?"

I have to compromise.
it is hard, but I believe on my reliable self,
I can handle myself and other people with care.

I just have to learn more about
  1. Stabilizing my enthusiasm over simple things.
  2. as I learned about self-disclosure, I learned that I can't always bringing up topics about things I am interested in to everyone. I already knew that everyone is not as interested as I am to know other people's life. I enjoy knowing people and I ought to remind myself, "this thing is only attractive to you, Stella".
  3. Still about my enthusiasm over simple things.
    I have to learn how to bind my enthusiasm securely. reveal it only to people who have the same interest with me. sometimes I think I am just too expressive. there is a tendency inside myself to show the world what I really feel. I talk blatantly, sometimes I forgot how my words would produce effects upon other people. I was once told by my friend, in an evaluative way, that I am such an authentic person. I was then took it as a compliment. now, I feel it is a doom. I am so authentic people might offended when talking with me. well, I guess this is a big homework for me to make myself more adjustable to other people.

after thinking for some time, well, in the end I asked my brother
and he gave me such a wise answer.
I even added my opinion to his wisdom response

"only change if it is good? good for whom?"

*brother silence*

"okay, for myself. always consider ourselves first
before anyone, right?"

*brother nodded*

so the matter is actually only one.
hold yourself, Stell, not everyone could handle you
unless your own self. hahhaha.
enjoy the process of changing, Stella.



I got this link this morning.
an 8-years-relationship-fighter friend of mine
shared this on my WhatsApp group.

Traits for Lasting Relationships

I really touched by the post.
the writers poured their thought perfectly well
and I could blend perfectly with the text.
I observed my grandparents over-50-years-relationships
for about a month, just before I read the post.
I can't agree more with the post, it is really true!

maybe there is some kind of differences
related to how Asian people show kindness and generosity
towards people the care and love.
but overall, the post is GOOD.