Monday, 15 August 2016

Just Be You, Whatever It Takes

"I believe you've changed."

"How could you imply such a thing?"

"We are alike but hurts turn you to be like this. You just say it you don't care but your heart still can't ignore."
Me talking with her on one of our fine day.

My latest favorite human, Kanya, is a very unique one.
She laughs so much, even when she is sad she could laugh.
She is rarely mad and she has the joy I've never seen anyone has it.
Well, maybe I know someone who has the same positive vibe like her,
but unluckily she has died.

I find we share lots of same idealism, values, and insights.
We often notice the same things from a moment
which no one doesn't really care.
We talk much about many similar interest
and I like the way she understand well my points when we discuss
certain abstract things.

In conclusion, I can feel that we are alike so much
but her behavior shows she has changed a lot.

I asked her why and what makes her turns into such an ignorant.
At first she denied but then reluctantly, she answered my question.
"Is it because of your latest ex? The quote boy?"
"Yup. How I do really hate quotes now."

Knowing this kind of ugly truth, hurts me bad.
It is effing sucks when you know hurts change people dramatically.
I wish you can have your old self back, Kanya.
I don't know her, but I believe she is more alive than you are now.

a strong self-reminder
borrowed from here.

P.S: this conversation makes me remember another broken person.
I tried to fix him, but in the end it was only me who got a lot of bruises.
anyway, my dearest brother told me
"it only costs you twice if hurts change the real you.
you are not only lose the one you trust so much,
but yourself also."